BY DILIP BOBB

Auld Lang Syne

Lest old acquaintances be forgotten in the haze of the new year, here are some of the people who deserved special mention in 1997 because of their contribution to the cause of democracy, the right to do wrong and get away with it, and some who qualify for all the wrong reasons, which is becoming the leitmotif for the 1998 elections.

Sitaram Kesri: For believing that the only way to get Sonia's attention was to bring down a government or two. Instead, found himself playing the role of station master at the New Delhi railway station, flagging off trainloads of Congressmen headed, ticketless, for greener pastures and blaming him for derailing the party line. Sonia's decision to hitch her wagon to the Rajdhani means he may be shunted off to the sidings.

Laloo Prasad Yadav: For providing much fodder for tout; for proving that a woman's place is in the kitchen cabinet; that caste has no bars, specially in a Patna jail, and that a lantern, like his political ambitions, does not throw much light outside its immediate vicinity. Which also explains his return to the use of pigeons as a means of communication, a backward move in more ways than one.

Sonia Gandhi: For entertaining the public in sign language and, like those game shows on TV, keeping everyone busy trying to interpret the meaning of nods, smiles, frowns and other facial expressions. Finally, in the year-end episode of Dynasty, broke her vow of silence to announce, through a flunky naturally, that she would not spoil the New Year party by her absence. The public will now finally have a chance to hear her speak, unless she decides to use a ventriloquist's dummy from the party pool.

Atal Bihari Vajpayee: For proving that he is first among his equals in the Prime-Ministers-in-the-Waiting-Room. By projecting him as the top man for the top job, the BJP has also had to perform an amazing vote-face. Unfortunately, as one of its own ideologues admitted, the mask does not maketh the man.

Justice Jain: For proving that the wider you cast your net, the more fishy your judgement can catch. With more judges like him in Indian courts, the police will have to question the population of an entire state to find the culprit. In the house of cards he constructed, there was clearly more than one One-eyed Jack.

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