February 16, 1998

By Dilip Bobb

It's the most popular game show on television. The motto being that the family that plays together, stays together. With fortunes to be won or lost at the touch of a remote control, the excitement is at fever-pitch. Much depends on the relative reflexes of the participating families. Here's how the latest episode went under its affable host, Raj Kaun Karega:

Host: Welcome to a special election special of family fortunes. Today, the families involved will battle it out for a bonus bumper prize: whoever wins will get 275 seats ... I mean points. Our guests this evening are the Gandhi family on one side and the Sangh Brothers on the other. Here comes the first question. Who is the highest authority under the Indian Constitution?

Priyanka Gandhi: Mummy, of course. Everybody knows that all roads lead to Rome, Raj.

Host: Sonia and yet so far. The correct answer is the President.

Priyanka Gandhi: But he's a nobody. I keep telling him Mummy Yaad Dila Dengi and he starts trembling more than normal. He's always begging her to take over as president.

Host: I meant the President of India, not of the Congress party. Now for the next question. Who is the father of the nation?

Rahul Gandhi: That's easy. My brother-in-law, Robert Vadra. By the time their first child is born, Priyanka will be prime minister and he will be the father of the nation. Everybody knows that. They are even saying so at Number 10.

Host: What else would they be saying at 10 Janpath?

Rahul Gandhi: I meant my neighbours at 10 Downing Street.

Host: Well, on to the next question. What is India's national symbol?

Robert Vadra: The hand. You should see the reaction when my mother-in-law raises hers. Everybody recognises it, even though some of my nasty competitors say it's a foreign hand.

Host: Wrong again. Viewers, it looks like the Gandhi family really needs to get its act together if they are going to win the bonus prize of 275 and make their fortune. Now, for the final question. Can you name the seven wonders of the world?

Sonia Gandhi: Bofors, Bluestar, Babri...

Host: The Seven Wonders?

Sonia: Sorry, I thought you said seven blunders. My apologies.

Host: Well viewers, it looks like the Gandhi family has fallen short of the magic figure of 275, which goes to the Sangh Brothers by default.

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