February 16, 1998

Soldiers of the Disunited Front

Indian politics is the theatre of the misnomer. Even so, rarely has a name been as inapt as that of the United Front (UF). In a coalition where everybody is fighting everybody, the latest factional war is between Mulayam Singh Yadav and the CPI. Actually the animosity goes back a couple of years, to the time when Mulayam split the allied CPI unit in Uttar Pradesh. Next, he took on Indrajit Gupta when -- as Union ministers -- they differed on whether or not the battle against the BJP should follow constitutional niceties.

Now comes phase III. Mulayam has declared the CPI a regional party and taken exception to its decision to contest seats in Uttar Pradesh. He has spoken of the CPI's desperation to garner 4 per cent of the vote in at least four states so as to retain its national party status. The comrades are livid. A.B. Bardhan, CPI general secretary, talks of the 4 per cent norm being reached in seven states. With friends like Mulayam, who needs capitalists?

-- Javed M Ansari

Starry Eyed

H.D. Deve Gowda has two fetishes: slumber and astrology. That's why people were astonished when he filed his nomination papers from Hassan at 11.15 a.m., 45 minutes before the supposedly inauspicious Rahu kala ended. Mr Humble Farmer immediately declared this was proof he was "not orthodox or superstitious". As the local rationalists' society considered giving Deve Gowda honorary membership, the truth emerged. A Keralite astrologer had told Deve Gowda to file his papers "between 11.05 and 11.20 a.m". Not only did he do so, but his son, Kumaraswamy, did the same in Kanakpura.

-- Stephen David

Helping Father

Prime Minister I.K. Gujral is spending eight whole days, ending February 14, in Jalandhar seeking votes for himself. To protect him from explosives, the Punjab Police has been forced to borrow frequency jammers from the security entourage of Maninderjit Singh Bitta, former Youth Congress chief.

Gujral's campaign manager in Jalandhar is son Naresh. Junior Gujral is targeting Sonia Gandhi. His innovative bilingual one-liners seem quite in keeping with the local idiom: "The rate at which Sonia's offering apologies, she may end up being called Sorrian (plural for sorry in Punjabi English)." The next barb's a trifle better: "Congress (I) has been reduced to Congress (Italy)." Funny, even the BJP's Pramod Mahajan said that recently. Akali-sponsored ticket, a Congressman's security equipment, BJP-style acerbity: Gujral's campaign is truly representative of composite culture.

-- Ramesh Vinayak

Reign of Error

In the OBC politics of the Hindi heartland, they're the awesome twosome, the cow belt's very own Punch and Judy show. Try as they might, Kalyan Singh and Mulayam Singh Yadav can't do without each other. Recently, the two were to address (different) rallies in Ghazipur, eastern Utttar Pradesh, on the same day. Kalyan arrived, helicopter and all, spotted a large crowd and immediately asked the pilot to land. He was running up the stairs to the dais when he noticed something was amiss. The flags; they were the Samajwadi Party's. So was the crowd -- which booed Kalyan while he beat a hasty retreat and sought the BJP rally venue.

Moments later, Mulayam arrived. Ever one to make an overstatement of a whisper, he declared Kalyan's bloomer as evidence of the BJP's fruitless search for supporters. Obviously, said Mulayam, this indicated Kalyan's party would be wiped out in the coming polls. Last heard, Kalyan was swearing vengeance.

-- Javed M Ansari

Soliciting Card

Among the busiest men in these elections is Khairati Lal Bhola, aged 70 and president of the Bhartiya Patita Udhar Sabha, dedicated to the cause of "India's 23 lakh sex workers". Bhola alleges 18 lakh sex workers have been effectively disenfranchised by the EC: "Only five lakh prostitutes in the country's 1,100 red-light areas and 2.75 lakh kothas have voter I-cards." It takes all types.

-- Sayantan Chakravarty

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