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| April 17, 2000 | ||
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| FLIPSIDE Laloo Con Here's fodder for thought. Laloo Prasad Yadav ... sorry, Rabri Devi ... decides to get net-savvy. He ... I mean she ... isn't going to be left out of anything that earns him a few extra votes. So, mouse in hand, he, or rather she, orders up a computer for every minister. All 84 of them. His brother-in-law, sorry, her brother, has just, coincidentally, started a computer firm. Now that Bihar's ready for the revolution, log on and find out how bihar.con is doing. By Dilip Bobb
rabri~laloo.con: Our apologies. We tried to hit a century but we ran out of relatives/allies/partners and non-Congressmen. Next time, if you vote us back to power, we promise to give you more. LCD (Less Confused Desi): Accepting that jumbo cabinets are not confined to Bihar, why do you need eight ministers in charge of education and youth affairs? rabri~laloo.con: When our eight children were growing up we realised they needed to be individually educated. Misa and Tada were fine but the rest were quite backward. So this is to ensure that all those families with eight children are given individual attention. Then, we heard that today's youth are being corrupted by western influences and were having affairs. So we decided that these eight ministers should also educate our youth against affairs. Simple really. EC (Equally Confused): Why do you need 10 ministers for agriculture and animal husbandry? rabri~laloo.con: That is like asking which came first, the fodder or the buffalo? The chief minister has adopted a brilliant scheme. To increase agriculture, increase the ministers. Bihar's agriculture will grow 10 times. We also have a rich culture in Bihar which needs fertilising, just like animals needs husbandry. I, as chief minister, am eternally grateful to have a husbandry like Laloo. Everyone should have a husbandry like him, then they will be one big, happy family, just like ours. SC (Somewhat Confused): The state's finances are in such a mess. Is that why you have nine ministers handling finance portfolios? rabri~laloo.con: Finance is a complicated subject. I faced a lot of complications because of finance and they put me behind bars. To ensure it doesn't happen again, we have introduced some novel scams ... we mean schemes. These ministers will all come up with employment-generation schemes. These will generate revenue, which will generate power, which will generate additional portfolios so that future generations can have enough jobs. Simple really. DC (Disgruntled Congressman): If it's so simple, how come the Congress has been given the leftovers? rabri~laloo.con: This is like asking which should come first, the aloo or the samosa? We are going by the Centre's recommendations that all those categorised as going Backward should get 10 per cent reservations. Out of 84 berths, we have given you exactly 8.4. Simple really. TC (Terribly Confused): How long can this farce go on? rabri~laloo.con (translated from Hindi): As long as Dubai has a don, Laloo will be the king of con. (This piece was written before the CBI chargesheet.) |
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VCD
(Very Confused Desi): Why does Bihar have 84 ministers?