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FLIPSIDE
Ill-Timed
By
Dilip Bobb
There's
much hype surrounding the Millennium Summit being held in New York and
India's stand on various key issues. Having let down Indian entrepreneurs
in Silicon Valley by cutting out one leg of his visit because of his own
legs having let him down, Prime Minister Atal Bihari Vajpayee's visit
seems to be ill-timed. Here's how his meeting with prominent Indians went.
 Brajesh
Mishra: Welcome to this meeting with the Indian delegation led by
the prime minister. They are here to explain India's stand on various
issues, but owing to the fact that Mr Vajpayee has been advised by his
doctors not to stand for very long, please keep your questions short and
sweet, preferably the ones we handed you at the door.
Ist Prominent
Indian: Mr Prime Minister, everybody here is very impressed with how
healthy and stable Indian democracy is. The country no longer needs to
stand on crutches. Would you agree?
PM: (long
pause) Yes, Indian democracy is in good health and in good hands. We can
now stand on our own feet, most of the time. Some sections of our society
still need crutches, but it is not a national crisis, as the Indian press
is making it out to be.
2nd Prominent
Indian: It is good to know that India is in good health. We were all
very impressed with your finance minister, Yashwant Sinha, during his
visits to the US and the promises he made during his meetings with us.
Can he tell us when those promises will be fulfilled?
PM: Well,
unfortunately, Mr Sinha had to undergo an operation recently. It's nothing
serious, just something that he has been postponing ever since he took
office. He will soon be up and about and ready to redeem his pledge and
make his cyst with destiny. Have no fear, the economy is in good health.
3rd Prominent
Indian: We were also equally impressed with your industry and commerce
minister, Murasoli Maran, who had talked of clearing all the bottlenecks
and headaches that business people face when trying to invest in India.
Can he tell us what progress has been made?
PM: Well,
unfortunately, Mr Maran has also opted out because of his own headaches
which force him to take off for two weeks every month. It is nothing serious,
just migraine. He should be up and about and ready to take care of your
problems. Don't worry, Indian industry is in excellent health.
4th Prominent
Indian: We were also impressed with the promises made by your rural
development minister for improving our villages. Has any progress been
made?
PM:
Unfortunately, Mr Patwa has been unwell for some time and is in intensive
care. But don't worry, the Indian Cabinet is in good health.
5th Prominent
Indian: We would also ...
Brajesh
Mishra: No more questions. Mr Vajpayee has been advised to keep his
meetings short and he will now retire for a long nap. Thank you for coming.
As you can see, Indian democracy is in great shape.
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