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Flipside
Body Language
By
Dilip Bobb
By
now, thanks to the extensive, even excessive coverage given to each stage
of the knee operation which Prime Minister Atal Bihari Vajpayee is to
undergo, every schoolboy could become a surgeon overnight. Diagrams, charts
and three-dimensional illustrations have provided, quite literally, step-by-step
detailing of the procedure. However, the team of doctors assigned the
task of assessing the prime minister's overall health are worried about
other body parts. Here's the assessment of the team.
 The
Other Extremity: Equally shaky, some would say unbalanced: As a constituent
of the National Democratic Alliance, Mamata Banerjee's Trinamool Congress
has this tendency to do a war dance at every available opportunity, thus
threatening to topple the Prime Minister. Can be dangerous if allowed
to fester and suggests that oil's not well in the Front. Intensity of
attacks increases whenever local elections are due in West Bengal. Affliction
can be tackled by a procedure known as rollback which is known to bring
some relief.
The Right
Hand: No one knows what the right hand is doing, certainly not the
Left, or the pundits whose job it is to X-ray such issues. In fact, no
one quite knows what or who is the right hand. It used to be L.K. Advani
but all those photographs in the papers showing him sitting alone and
isolated at Raj Ghat suggest that there is a serious problem and he could
be out of joint.
The Central
Nervous System: Has got more nervous after the recent reshuffle showed
a sharp rise in blood pressure among many aspirants and National Democratic
Alliance partners. The Central Nervous System, referred to in operational
terms as the pmo, remains an area of concern since no one quite knows
how competent it really is to handle any serious national crisis. On occasion,
shows definite symptoms that it needs to be urgently replaced.
The Head:
The Prime Minister may have succeeded in bringing some elements of
the Sangh Parivar to heel, but frequent and irrational swings by individuals
has the effect of keeping the temperature on the boil. Latest example
is RSS Sarsanghchalak K.S. Sudarshan's demand to throw out all foreign
Christian missionaries and his attack on the government's economic reform
policies. Head and heart clearly do not see eye to eye.
The External
Front: Recent tests, nuclear or otherwise, have shown a sharp divide
and symptoms of unnatural growth. Officially, the external front is represented
by Jaswant Singh. However, the unnatural growth represented by National
Security Adviser Brajesh Mishra and his frequent pronouncements on foreign
affairs indicate a serious problem. In medical terms, described as my-o-cordial
infraction.
The Heart:
Represented by the man whom the fuss is all about, the patient, which
is what the Prime Minister needs a lot of to keep his government together
and in one piece. Thankfully, his heart seems to be in the right place.
The only long-term problems come from his extremities like Mamata Banerjee
who has this nasty habit of making the Prime Minister bend and come to
his knees every time she needs her picture in the newspapers.
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