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LIVING: MISMATCHED MARRIAGES
It's Brisk Business Everywhere
In Guria of Jaisalmer,
Jammu Khan Bhaiya got his three minor daughters-Asidan, 8, Shakina, 12
and Vistan, 14-married to men three to four times their age. The youngest
has not yet attained puberty and will be joining her husband as soon as
she does. While Jammu admits having taken Rs 50,000 for each of them,
villagers say he is actually richer by Rs 5 lakh.
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Shafi Khan Janija, 40, paid Rs 25,000 to
the family of Satbai, 14, besides pledging his 12-year-old sister
to Satbai's brother.
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"What is wrong with such marriages?"
Chinnesar Khan of Kapurali village in Barmer district asks. "How
else will we make money?" The cynical father got his 14-year-old
daughter Jamila married to Ali Khan, 48, of Lakhetali. Ali had promised
Chinnesar land worth Rs 2 lakh but with more elderly men wooing the beautiful
Jamila, Chinnesar kept Ali waiting for months and extracted an extra Rs
25,000 in cash. Now, the landless Ali has left Jamila with her parents
and moved to Gujarat to earn a livelihood. "It's so unfair,"
whispers Jamila but her father shuts her up and orders her to continue
milking the goat. Says Ali's brother Hussein Khan: "The family tree
has to grow and a young girl is very useful for that purpose."
The mismatches can at times be the other way
round too-older brides for younger grooms-but still to the woman's disadvantage.
Raven-haired Reshma, 20, of Mekan Ka Par village in Barmer became a widow
in the first year of marriage. Her father Mitha Khan had married her off
to 10-year-old Resham Khan, a TB patient, for Rs 60,000. Resham's father
Hassan Khan needed someone to look after his ailing son and Mitha had
jumped at the offer. What will Reshma do now? Hassan has her life all
chalked out. "Our society stipulates that widows remarry their brothers-in-law,"
he says. So Reshma's next husband will be his second son Akbar Khan, 8.
A wailing Reshma shakes her head from side to side but knows she has little
say in the matter. "It is unfair to her but we have to abide by what
the community directs," says her uncle Idda Khan. And that is the
last word.
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| Reshma, 20, was married
to Resham Khan, 10, who died. She is now being forced to marry Resham's
brother Akbar, 8 (below). |
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Even the authorities don't question it. In fact,
if there is one thing that could be more shocking than the instances themselves,
it is official ignorance. A.K. Hemkar, director, social welfare, who was
until last year the collector of Barmer, says he has not heard about such
cases. Sanjay Aggarwal, Barmer's superintendent of police, admits it is
a serious matter but adds, "I doubt if we will ever get information
and help from the community to prosecute the guilty."
According to law, a man who is above 18 and
marries a minor girl can be prosecuted. Criminal proceedings can be initiated
against anyone solemnising a child marriage where the girl, boy or both
are children. Also, a man having sexual relations with a wife below 15
can be charged with rape-even if it is with the girl's consent. However,
not one girl has come forward to complain. "We don't expect young
girls to be willing to undergo a medical test," says Ajit Singh Shekhawat,
deputy inspector-general of police, Jaipur range.
The Government, clearly, is nonplussed about
initiating changes, but leaving the girls to their plight is no answer.
Sujeet Sarkar, programme manager for Unnati, a development organisation,
feels enlisting the help of the maulvis would go a long way in checking
mismatched marriages. Mumtaj Ben, on her part, is determined to launch
a public campaign to create awareness among the girls and bring their
cruel fathers and husbands around. But it will not be an easy task given
the warped mindset of the people. The hopelessness of the situation reminds
one of the graffiti on the rear of a bus on a desert track. "Aa to
yun hi halela," it screams. "We will run like this only."
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