GUYSPEAK

HE SAYS: A friend of mine is interested in another friend of mine...
YOU THINK HE MEANS: A friend of his is interested in me.
HE MEANS: I am interested in you.

HE SAYS: I am not really that hungry.
YOU THINK HE MEANS: Let's eat a little later.
HE MEANS: I am low on dough today.

HE SAYS: Most girls are so over-possessive.
YOU THINK HE MEANS: You're not like other girls.
HE MEANS: Remember this when you see me with another girl!

HE SAYS: Valentine's Day is so over-hyped.
YOU THINK HE MEANS: But I understand its true importance...
HE MEANS: So don't expect me to do anything special!

HE SAYS: That shade of lipstick looks gorgeous on you.
YOU THINK HE MEANS: I really like how you look.
HE MEANS: If this is how you look with makeup, then I'll have to lie a lot!

THEY SPEAK

THEY SAY: Everyone has become so materialistic.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: Everyone around is so materialistic, except you.
THEY MEAN: Remember this when I don't get you a birthday gift.

THEY SAY: Why don't you go for the party? You were invited.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: You go alone and enjoy yourself.
THEY MEAN: If you persuade me a little bit more, I'll come, too.

THEY SAY: Don't have any expectations from me.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I am not very committed to this relationship.
THEY MEAN: But that doesn't mean I don't have any expectations from you!

THEY SAY: I don't give a damn about what people have to say.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I don't give a damn about what people have to say about anything.
THEY MEAN: I don't give a damn, as long as they don't say anything
about me.

THEY SAY: I'll call you.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: He/she will call me.
THEY MEAN: Don't call me.

THEY SAY: I'm not sure.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I need to think about this.
THEY MEAN: No.

THEY SAY: I really like you.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I'm falling in love with you.
THEY MEAN: I don't love you.

THEY SAY: Maybe.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: Maybe maybe maybe.
THEY MEAN: No way!

THEY SAY: Sure!
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: Sure!
THEY MEAN: Maybe.

THEY SAY: Why don't you call me?
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I'd love to hear from you.
THEY MEAN: I don't wanna appear too eager.

THEY MEAN You should meet more people.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: You're not meeting enough people.
THEY MEAN: I need to meet more people.

THEY MEAN No-one understands me
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: My family and friends don't understand me
THEY MEAN: You don't understand me

THEY SAY: Let's keep our options open.
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: I'm scared to make a commitment.
THEY MEAN: I want to see more than one person at a time.

THEY SAY: Have you seen a movie lately?
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: Are you up-to-date with the movie scene?
THEY MEAN: Do you want to go out for a movie?

THEY SAY: Is he/she a good friend of yours?
YOU THINK THEY MEAN: You seem to get along very well.
THEY MEAN: I hope you are not two-timing me.

GAL SPEAK

SHE SAYS: I wanna concentrate on my studies.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: Let me concentrate on my Studies.
SHE MEANS: Anything but you!

SHE SAYS: Let's go dutch.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: We women are equal.
HE MEANS: If you're a halfway decent guy, you'll pay.

SHE SAYS: He calls me up frequently.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: We are great friends.
SHE MEANS: Why aren't you getting jealous???

SHE SAYS: You are a really nice guy.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: I really like you.
SHE MEANS: You don't electrify me.

SHE SAYS: Let's eat what you want to eat.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: Our choice is so similar...
SHE MEANS: If you really loved me, you'd know what I want to eat!

SHE SAYS: I need your help with this assignment.
YOU THINK SHE MEANS: You're soooooo smart!
SHE MEANS: Why don't you do my homework while I go out with my guy?

The Upside Down Love Dictionary

An inside-out look at the new love language!

By Vatsala Kaul

Aby: When an ex-flame refuses to die and keeps getting resurrected... You can't lock this!
How can I ever forget her? She is my eternal Aby.

Britney: Virginal land with a huge No Parking sign. Takes a bit of adJustin' even if you are 'N Sync with it.

Convergence: Total love where your bandwidth matches the other person's.
I have never felt this way before. It must be convergence.

Dotcom: When you fall crazily in love and it goes phuss in six months.

E-commerce: Stuff you buy for your crush with your dad's/mom's credit card.

FTV: When bodily love takes over mind and soul. Mostly after 11pm.

Genome: Someone whose mouth, eyes or nose-or ears... look exactly like the person you actually have a crush on.
Oooh, how I love him... he is Hrithik's genome.

Hurriyat: When you use the absolutely wrong means to get what-or who-you really want.

Instant Karma: When you remix your lines and get someone to dance with you without a hitch.

Jennifer:The girl who has everything-the Brad, the butter and the jam!

Kumbh: The big confessional where you wash away all the sins you committed from waist down.
I thought I wouldn't tell her all my secrets but then I Kumbhed about all my exes to her...

Lopez: That mythical dreamland where love don't cost a thing.

Matchfixing: When cash overtakes crush.

Nepal Case: When a person spreads baseless rumours about other people, especially about other popular people.

Orange: Person, usually a parent, who overtakes your phone network.
From taking over Essar....

Patel Rap: When you use someone else's creations to further your interests.
It was I who wrote that poem and he Patel Rapped it to Anisha. The cheapo!

Qualis: Another word for parents or people who are always asking, "Where are you go-o-o-ing?"

Ricky: The guy who gets to dance with all the hot girls.

Suzanne: Someone who nabs your heart-throb, but it's not their fault.
Can't blame anyone for my state of affairs. I was Suzanned.

Temple: A case where someone just doesn't give up... temple yahin banayenge!

Unbreakable: A love so strong that your bones begin to break.

Vishwanathan: The king of romantic moves, the guy/girl who wins the game.

WAP: The kind of love everyone talks about, but does it exist?
I am in total WAP with her... I am enabled, but she is too mobile for me.

X: Commonly pronounced 'aXe'. A person who always comes out looking dishevelled.
He said he hadn't been upto anything at the movies, but he came out looking aXed!

Yahoo: Guy/girl who helps you find the answers to your homework, a human search engine.

Zip Drive: Something all people, in love need to zip up their mouths so they don't drive other people mad with their love tales.